I'm sticky this week
Which is because it's hot outside and warm inside the house
Which is not too often, since I'm in The flipping Netherlands
The country that is known for being cold, wet and full of frogs (Klein, koud kikkerlandje)
Anyway, that is not the case this week
They even predict temperatures of 38 degrees Celsius, which is ALOT!
On a more serious note:
I'm also stuck. Stuck in my life.
There is no movement what so ever
Some parts don't need movement: I mean, I like my apartment and I still lov my boyfriend
But there is nothing ahead
Mostly my work-field is stuck. it's been more then a year and I still haven't got work
My feeling says that how longer it will take, the less chance I get. Especcially since the knowledge I got from my education, will slowly slip away my mind, since I'm not busy with it. And I'm also not up-to-date to all the programmes that are used by now, since those programmes keep getting updates and better versions, which I don't get to learn as I'm not working with them.
And because of my health-issues I can't just chance to other kind of work, because they're too "heavy" for my health
And other works that I don't need a degree from and will be able to do with my health, I'm too old for.
Too old as in: My salaery will be a lot higher then those 16 years old who are also able to do the job.
So I'm feeling defeated.
I've always grown up with the idea that you either work, or stay home to take care of the children. And I've always seen myself work.
(Even if I would get children, which I'm still not sure of) I would always see myself working.
I've fought very hard in my situation to get my diploma's and to keep on going for 20+ years.
But I feel a bit defeated.
Perhaps in a while I get something that will move my life forward a bit.
Or atleast a plan/direction to where I might be headed.
But we'll see.
On a more brighter note:
Castlefest is almost here!
The end of the months
So I'll be offline from wednesday July 29 and back online monday August 3